A half-century of life is impressive on its own. It’s even more of an achievement when two people do it together. Here are three Berks County couples who are still going strong more than 50 years after tying the knot.
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
Jack & Margaret Boyle
Seven Decades Supporting Each Other
Jack Boyle’s sunset years have been typical.
Since retiring at the young age of 57, he has cycled across the continental United States four times, walked across once and paced runners at the Chicago Marathon. He and his wife, Margaret, have visited more than 50 countries, with adventures that included an archaeology dig in Jerusalem and a mission trip to help build a church in the Dominican Republic.
You know, the usual retirement activities.
“The thing is, Margaret’s support is the only way I could do all that,” he says. “So, we really did it together.”
They’ve been doing it together for nearly seven decades, also welcoming five children, 11 grandchildren and six great-grandchildren to the world during that span.
Jack and Margaret met as teenagers at a church softball game in Allentown in the summer of 1957, getting engaged a few months later and marrying the following summer. The wedding was at Allentown Presbyterian Church, which has since moved, with the old site becoming a museum.
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
“ I think that's where we're the strongest. Just trying to help other people .”
“It rained,” Margaret remembers. “The only Saturday that it rained in June of that year.”
Bell Laboratories transferred Jack to Reading in 1959. Working as a customer representative for Bell Telephone in Allentown, Margaret was able to transfer as well. Their initial dwellings in the city were lacking, but Jack promised his wife that if she stuck it out, he would build the house of her dreams.
“She had cut out a picture from McCall’s magazine when we were first married,” Jack recalls. “And then a few years later I said, ‘Do you still have that picture?’ Fortunately, the architect’s name was on it. I sent away for the plans and I redrew them myself. And then we found a builder. We stayed in that house for 46 years.”
Jack retired in the ’90s as a manager of engineering and manufacturing after 38 years with the Bell system. Eventually, the couple decided that they wanted to spend the golden years of their lives in a senior living community, choosing The Highlands at Wyomissing. But just because they’re living in a retirement village doesn’t mean they’ve truly retired.
“A lot of people just go and sit in rocking chairs and paint railings,” Jack says, “and we’re not going to do that.”
They haven’t. Margaret has served on committees and works in the gift shop. Jack served as president and vice president of the Residents’ Council, chaired an endowment fund, chaired a scholarship fund he played a role in developing and helped to start a visiting program for people in skilled nursing.
Nearly 70 years of marriage brings with it an overabundance of memories. Anything stick out?
“When we were married 50 years, Margaret wanted to renew our vows, and we did it with friends and family,” Jack says. “And almost all of our family was there. What a feeling it was when we were saying our vows as I looked out and I saw all of these people, whatever side of the church they were on, were part of us.”
They also highlighted as favorite memories the building of their dream house, all the traveling they’ve done and the various events and activities in which their children and grandchildren have been involved.
“We try to go to everything, but they’re all over the country now,” Margaret says.
While a spread-out family isn’t good for attending sporting events and the like, it does come in handy for vacations, especially when family members live in places like Florida and New England.
Margaret says Jack’s best attribute is his desire to help everybody; Jack lauds Margaret’s dependability and selflessness.
“I think that’s where we’re the strongest,” Jack says. “Just trying to help other people.”
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
Andrew & Janet Surmick Andrew & Janet Surmick
A 56-Year (and Counting) Honeymoon
Andrew and Janet Surmick never went on a honeymoon. So you could say they’re still in the honeymoon phase of their relationship. And it’s still going strong 56 years after their wedding.
Initially, Janet dated Andrew’s cousin, but a chance encounter while out cruising led her to a different branch in that family’s tree.
After a few years of dating, they got hitched in 1968 at St. Francis of Assisi Church in West Hazleton, Luzerne County. Then they shoehorned essential possessions into their small 1961 Chevrolet Corvair and drove to Wichita, KS, where Andrew was stationed at McConnell Air Force Base.
“We had nowhere to live,” Janet recalls. “So, we drove to Wichita and stopped at a Big Bob’s restaurant, got a newspaper and looked for an apartment. We ended up renting one that was furnished where a lot of the military lived.”
When Andrew, a parachute rigger, got out of the service in 1971, they moved to Berks County and never left. Today, they live in Blandon.
Before they retired, Andrew designed truck bodies for Reading Body Works, supervised at Federal-Mogul and worked as a transportation planner for Sara Lee Foods. Janet worked as a telephone operator at Bell Telephone, a bank teller and an assistant teacher.
“We’re very family-oriented,” Janet says. “We didn’t have much money growing up in the Coal Region, but we had great values. We were brought up that you have a good work ethic and you help people.”
In their free time, they enjoy going to casinos. They like the Borgata in Atlantic City but don’t get there often due to the drive. Around Berks, they frequent Hollywood Casino at Penn National Race Course in Morgantown. They also enjoy playing the board game Sequence with their neighbors, going out to eat and spending time with their two adult children, Stacey and Shawn, and two grandchildren, Cody and Kylie.
“I’m very proud of all of my children and grandchildren,” Janet says. “Because I always told them you have to work for what you want. No one is going to hand it to you. And I think that’s stuck with my children because they have very good jobs and lives.”
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
Some of their favorite memories involve their grandchildren, including three Disney Dream cruises.
“I went down the water slide at midnight when the fireworks were going,” Andrew remembers.
There was also the whipsaw vacation at a timeshare owned by Andrew’s uncle along Lake Tahoe. The couple planned for a week of relaxation but only stayed for one night because their first grandchild decided to make an appearance six weeks early.
Looking forward, Andrew says he would like to stay healthy while Janet hopes to see her grandchildren get married.
Speaking of marriage, what’s the secret to staying happily married for nearly six decades?
“We put our partner first,” Andrew says.
Adds Janet: “I would say communicate. I would say respect. I would say learn to forgive. And no marriage is perfect, but don’t ever give up.”
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
Bob & Diane Barbe
50 Years of Laughter
The first time Bob Barber asked his future wife Diane to marry him, she turned him down.
The second time, too.
But the third time she was charmed. “I finally said, ‘OK, I think this guy really loves me,’” Diane recalls.
It’s safe to say he does: the Douglassville couple marks 50 years of matrimony this year.
The Barbers started as pen pals when Diane’s brother and future husband were in the Marines in the late 1960s. Bob was stationed in Okinawa, Japan, for most of his two years in the service, spending a brief period on a ship off the coast of Vietnam.
Their long-distance relationship lasted over a year, but they didn’t meet in person until 1972, a year after Bob and Diane’s brother came home. A Delaware County resident at the time, Bob came to town to catch up with his old mate, but he ended up spending more time with Diane. The connection was immediate.
The couple wed at St. Peter’s Catholic Church in Reading. Diane gave Bob a bit of a scare by showing up late to the ceremony. She and her father were chauffeured by her brother, who took a scenic route to the church on the windy roads around the Pagoda. Bob was 24 when they got married; Diane was 25.
“I’m only older by 10 months, but he always says, ‘Yeah, I married an older woman,’” Diane says.
The couple had two children, Michael and Kelly, which consumed most of the first 25 years of their marriage. They recently were blessed with their first grandchild, Evelyn.
“The way the world is nowadays, we’re just really lucky that both of our kids turned out well and never gave us a minute of grief,” Bob says.
Bob has owned a body shop, Paintworks Incorporated, in Stowe since the late ’90s, performing restorations for high-end cars.
Before that he plied his trade at a body shop in Wayne.
“Back then we did every Ferrari and Aston Martin that came into the country,” he says.
Photos By John A. Secoges, Secoges Photographics
“I painted cars that won the Indianapolis 500 for Penske. I’ve painted Roger Penske’s personal Porsche. The last car I painted for them was Bobby Unser’s car when he won the Indy 500.”
When Bob’s not painting cars, the couple likes to paint the town, go on day trips, listen to music, read books and hang out with their children.
Bob says Diane’s best attributes are being caring and understanding. Diane lauds Bob’s eagerness to go along with things.
“There probably are husbands that say, ‘Well, I'm not going to do that or this or whatever,’ but I’ll come up with stuff, and he’ll say, ‘OK, let’s do it,’” she says. “Like Halloween. Every Halloween I get costumes or masks for us. The best one we did, we dressed as Sonny and Cher a couple of years ago. And when I put the pictures on Facebook, everybody was like, I wish we could do that. And then he always says afterward, ‘Oh, that was fun.’”
They celebrated their 40th anniversary in Alaska. They’re debating what to do for their 50th, though visiting Cape May around Christmas is high on Diane’s list.
Happy to celebrate 50 years and excited to get to 60, the couple says having a long, happy marriage is a laugh.
“We laugh at each other, we laugh with each other,” Diane says. “And the one thing we learned right from the beginning is marriage is a work in progress. You move along with it. And always expect the unexpected.”
